Absence
Posted in despair, lost, love, memories, pain, silhouette 20 comments
Sound of the silence,
Silence through time,
Waiting for a whisper,
Whisper of your voice...
Waiting for a lifetime,
Lifetime spent for a moment,
Walking in the dark,
Darkness hiding your absence...
Weeping between smiles,
The smile binding my pain,
Longing to close the distance,
Distance turning me insane...
Longing for your touch,
Touch i would never feel again,
Dying with the winter,
Only this winter would come again...
This one, i wrote it more than a year ago, but never posted it anywhere...today, reading it again, i can only feel the irony of life...
Silence through time,
Waiting for a whisper,
Whisper of your voice...
Waiting for a lifetime,
Lifetime spent for a moment,
Walking in the dark,
Darkness hiding your absence...
Weeping between smiles,
The smile binding my pain,
Longing to close the distance,
Distance turning me insane...
Longing for your touch,
Touch i would never feel again,
Dying with the winter,
Only this winter would come again...
This one, i wrote it more than a year ago, but never posted it anywhere...today, reading it again, i can only feel the irony of life...
20 comments:
Yes your words do touch. Irony of life? What is meant by it?
Seriously, all the pain and inability to be with the one is painful. And that pain is what marks off your work from usual..
@Deepika
The irony being, when i wrote this, i was sad that i hadnt spoken to her for quite some time, and now life has brought me to a point when i wouldnt talk to her ever...
Regards,
The Silhouette...
Loved this pattern...
First sentence ending is second sentence beginning...and feel is also good...:)
Keep writing..Happy blogging...:)
@Valli
Thanks for your kind words...wrote it more than a year and a half ago...
Regards,
The Silhouette...
Loved it a lot...quite a touching an a painful verse..I can feel how it feels when someone dear to you is not there with you...in your case its much more...The end touched me like anything..the flow is beautiful !
And I guess this is my last comment from this account as I'm deleting my account...2-3 times plagiarism in a row and now I'm scared of publishing my work on my blog..hence deleting it...
Keep Writing,
Fatima
touchy poem
@Fatima
Well actually when i read it now, i myself can see a few mistakes in it...like the repetition n stuff...but i overall, i like it myself...Thanks for your kind words...
Why?? haven't you copyrighted your work?? its bad that people don't understand what a persons creation means to him..art was always the most alluring thing for copying...2-3 times you say?? forward some complaint sort of thing against those people...
Be back soon...dont lose heart...
Regards,
The Silhouette...
@sm
Thanks...i hope it touched you too...
Regards,
The Silhouette...
Hey I was thinking of the copyright as in registering on myfreecopyright...but I'm still a bit unsure and hence, I was thinking and I'm still thinking of deleting the blog...you know I just don't want people to use of art my talent in their name....its too painful...and its an irony none of my friends who blog have gone through this and they have 'n' no of followers and I feel they write good...come to think of it, I'm forced to question why me? I feel is my work that good that people copy or is it that, shez an ok writer doesn't matter people won't notice if we copy her work....
In a serious dilemma....sigh
Fatima
@Fatima
Register it there or any such site...its always good on our part to take as much precautions as we can...try it, then may be we would have some means to get back at such people who dont value others efforts...
Regards,
The Silhouette...
Oh... Sorry to hear that.
There's a reason why we shouldn't wait to tell our loved ones that we care.. Life has no certainty... We must say it before its too late.
Here goes the views... Like I had mentioned,skillful way of mingling the words,Keatsian in nature... Though I have become rather distant from those primal emotions that one feels and interprets about love,your poem did remind me that I haven't yet gone to astray... And if its a painful message that you wish to convey,you have conveyed it well... Only one advice I would give you was,somewhere in 2nd stanza flow was hindered due to a rather abrupt break, in the first lines of the second stanza... Try to make it more smoother... Apart from that,poem has been a good read...
Regards,
Anyo Shiyen.
What a handsome flow of thoughts my friend... should i be glad you nailed it... no...you should be glad co'z you nailed it... i think this loop poem is one of the best i ever read... i felt the melancholy but i was more attracted with the way you weaved it... i enjoyed the read... and i hope the new year is treating you kind buddy!:)
Have a good day.
~Kelvin
@Anyo
If any composition can invoke emotions in its reader, then it can be considered a job well done...well, for me at least...
i agree with you that the flow breaks in the second stanza, but then, i wouldnt be able to make myself change it buddy...
Thanks for your honest words...
Best regards,
The Silhouette...
@Kelvin
Hey buddy, glad to see you...and am humbled by your kind words...
With your prayers, the year is good still...
Best regards,
The Silhouette...
@Deepika
Truly said, matters of the heart are better said than hidden, at least you wouldnt live in the thought that things could have been different...and you dont have to blame yourself for the course of actions life takes thereafter...
The post script is in context with my previous posting "Crossroads of destiny"
Regards,
The Silhouette...
this is so beautifully written but it is so sad... i hope you get the strength to deal with the pain you are going through..
@Mehak
Hey, glad to see u...and thank you for your kind words...true it is sad, but come to think of it, when i wrote it, the matter wasnt that sad, but now when i finally posted it, there is no bigger grief...
Anyways, life goes on...
Regards,
The Silhouette...
more than the irony of life it felt like the chaos of heart..
nice writings!!
@Megharana
Hey, welcome to my blog... true it was the chaos of the heart when i wrote it, but today, its the irony that the end brings...
:)
Regards,
The Silhouette...
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